U Kiss - when love stops.

I don't know why this song really makes me sad. Enjoy! The part Eli and Dongho are mixed up.

Today is a home alone day.

Fuck! I've almost finish blogging everything when I accidentally click backspace too much and end up in the previous page without saving my post! OH NO, I'll have to retype everything again, not gonna blog about it in detail again. Crap! This is frustrating! Having to blog twice.

Anyway, here goes my day till now at 3pm. Wake up at 10am today because I'm really starving so hard till I can't get back to sleep. And with no food at home, I went out with my sis to JP to buy some Carbonara sauce to cook some spaghetti for my brunch and dinner. (Btw, I'm clicking save after every sentence I've typed, not gonna let history repeat itself!) But after reaching JP got so hungry so I take away chicken rice. I don't think I can stand the hunger while cooking the spaghetti. So after eating I'm blogging from 1pm till now, fuck it, fuck blogger! Why don't they help me save it?! /_\

Fine! I'll continue to blog since I have lot of time now, with no revisions and work. But I'm bored and CASHLESS! With only 1 tutee now, I can't sustain my standard of living! Just got my tuition pay last Saturday and I've spent every little bit of it after shopping with my sis on the same day! Went town with her and bought 2 tops from Forever 21, 1 shorts from Cotton On, MASKS (if you know me well, you should know I have a thing for masks, I just can't stop buying and using it! Well, this sounds better than buying but not using. HAHAHA and guess what I'm really proud of myself for being able to get 33 masks at $19! *happy), an IPhone casing and a customize key chain for my common Long champ bag (to differentiate between mine and others, heh). Been looking for a job the past few days but no one called me back! I guess I started looking for a job at the wrong time, should have start earlier since is the mid term school holidays now and lots of high school kids are looking for jobs too. Oh well, since markets have already been flooded with these youngsters maybe I should look for one after their holidays end. But that would means cashless for another 1 month and lifeless too. Not really a good idea. Or should I look for some admin job? But without any experience, is not that easy. No body would want some brainless girl in their company I guess. HAHAHA. My friends recommend me to get another tutee but I'll have to continue teaching even after holidays end, which might be a little hard to handle. Have to struggle through studies and assignments for my final year and tuition on the other hand? Don't think this will work for me, I need lots of time to revise!! Sigh, why those retail shops don't want me? :/

Anyway, went shopping with xw yesterday around town and Bugis (sg is just a dot, so we literally have nowhere to go). Before heading out, took a pic and I seriously think I looked so feminine with my short hair and NO MAKE UP FACE (well, I don't put make up so naturally is a makeup-less face heh). The right one with red hair and lacy top (from forever 21), is the one I look yesterday and the left, brown hair with some blogshop checkered top is a pic I took some time ago, before finals and after prelims, going school look. I have the same hairstyle but the left pic look so manly right? Maybe is the way I smile? I don't know but I think I look good in both pic, HAHAHAHAHA. Not saying I'm pretty or good looking but I think I look good for being able to pull off both man and feminine image. But this is just my personal opinion! Teehee.

Well, so back to blogging about details, after tuition last week, I went to the polyclinic to check my eyes before heading to town. Wah seriously have to complain a bit about the particular doctor there who really pissed me off. I know they normally finish work at 12pm but if there's still people waiting for their turns they can not leave, and I just happened to be the last few waiting for my turn. So after asking me what's wrong, I told the doc that my left eye hurts after removing my lens from my eye and that I can't see clearly even with my specs now (I've just did my specs last month, so is impossible for my power to increase that fast right?NO?) Then the doc asked me if I still can see or not? I said a bit blur? He asked so still can see? I was like, of course still can la I'm not blind eh. But being a polite girl so I replied yes. He asked what is the power of both my eyes and I told him left eye -4.75, right -6.00. My optician told me that's high for me but this bloody doc say still okay what?Not really high. O.O Then I continue expressing my doubts on why will my eye turn red after removing my lens, and he looked at my eye and said in a dead tone, well, I can tell you is not red now. WTH? Of course is not red now, I haven't been wearing my lens for 2 days!! But I just swallowed my anger when he sent me to another room to test my eyes' degree. Didn't even answer my doubts and just impatiently showing me that attitude like I'm wasting his time when he should be on his way home, like I'm some small kid making a fuss out of little things. But in the end he told me there's nothing wrong with my eyes and my power indeed went up higher which means I have to redo my specs again. Oh, he did use some torch thingy and examined my eyes. So now I'm back to wearing lens but not for long hours. I used to wear for really long hours and whenever I leave home, but now I'll just wear my specs if I'm not going out for long. I think my eyes turn red because of the larger diameter of the colored lenses now? I'm not really sure but I used to wear 14mm and now this is 14.2mm. Is not really a big difference but I guess maybe the bigger the lens, the drier my eyes will be? Cause they will covered up more of the eyes, right? My eyes still turn red now but at least I felt better and not panicky after the doc told me there's nothing wrong. 

Okay, finally after typing for so long, I'm at the ending part now. This is really a long post!! See, I'm really bored at home but is just too tiring to go out every single day! I admit I'm getting older HAHAHA. Oh well, lots of friends have been asking me when I'm going to go back Msia and I'm saying this now, I don't feel like going back this holiday. I wanted to find work first that's my first priority and I really think everyone in Malaysia is so so so busy with their own life now that even if I go back they won't have time for me. I'll just rot at home with no transportation of my own. I hate to depend on friends to fetch me around but since I don't have my own car and I don't trust myself to drive with my 2 years license so I prefers staying in Singapore where I can travel on my own and to places I like. 

And oh, have to blog a bit about this friend I have in Malaysia. We used to be quite close during our high school time and this is my government school friend (fyi, I've been to both private and government school during my high school time for 4 years and 1 years respectively, so I graduated at the government school). And this guy (I don't know if he will see this but I'm not bad mouthing you, I'm just telling you how I feel) talked to me last night through the fb chat. He asked me why I kept chatting to another guy friend of the same high school clique and not him. I told him is that guy who talked to me first and I just replied and since this on-going chatting guy seem busy with his life, I didn't take the initiative to talk to him. I don't know why he must say things like he's my bf and sound jealous just because I'm kinda closer to the other guy than him. He even said things like I know you miss the other guy la cause we kept chatting. Hello?Can I just chatted with a guy?And btw, he had a gf. And after that he went on asking why didn't I tell him when I'm back in Msia previously around CNY this year. I explained saying I don't usually tell everyone I'm back because that would sounds awkward and attention seeking if they don't want to know and are not close to me. So normally I would only tell like my BFF and those that keep in touch with me constantly. And then .. he asked how's my life recently, so I told him I'm enjoying my holidays now. He replied he's sad. I was like okay, I think I know why but I still asked him why? He said because I didn't even go back when I'm having my holidays and he asked me why must I 'fly' so far? I said is Singapore far? Nobody ever tell me I were far from them. This sounds a bit weird but I think he still look at me like I'm the 17 y/o girl he used to know. I admit I've changed, I'm more matured now and is frustrating having to talk about those 'jealous' feeling you have. I'm no longer the childish girl who like to seek attention by being 'close' with guys and feel good about having guys who felt jealous when I'm closer to another guy. Yeah I used to be this kind of attention seeking girl but I'm no longer now, feel so stupid. Ggeerr. I don't flirt around with guys anymore unless you're special *wink. Anyway, I hope this guy will see this and I really still appreciate you as my friend and thanks for remembering me and talk to me even when you're busy with your life. But I want to say if you really felt jealous, you can talk to me anytime and I will reply! Fb chat work both way fyi, is not like you can't talk to me unless I talk to you first and clearly I don't have a problem not talking to you first so if you have one, just talk to me okay? Not showing any attitude btw, I'm a friendly girl! REALLY!! :D

Okay, done! Bye readers. I know there's some thanks to the live traffic feed at the right side of my blog. Thanks for spending time reading! I'll blog more often. Heh.

PS: I love all my friends who never walk away from me, no matter what I've changed. 

Hyorin and K.Will

'Whenever you call'
Seriously both of them sung so beautifully. Whoa, send chills down my spine man!

Too hot to handle.

OMG! How can Jang Geun Seok be so perfect, he can model, act, sing and now rap? He's just so pretty when he smiles.

KOREAN BBQ!

Hey peeps, I'm back to blogging since there's nothing much I can do at home without having to revise and go to work. Been too relaxed lately at home, I'm not complaining though, is just too bored? HAHAHA. Must find a job soon. My brain is really resting now, except for thinking what outfits to wear when I go out, I literally didn't use my brain at all. HAHAHAHA, shall see how my brain gonna function after this 4 months holiday. Might need time to 'restart' my brain! 

Went jogging with xw at pioneer stadium, didn't jog for long before I started walking, body been feeling restless nowadays. Jog for 1km and walked for another 1km. took 18 mins I think to complete the 2km. Super slow!! But I don't really enjoy sweating so jog slowly for the perspire to dry. After waiting for xw to finish her 8 rounds we went to have breakfast at the Mac near her house. Had happy meal because is just too early to eat so much after the run. Went back home and rest for awhile before meeting her for dinner.

Went to Ssikkek for korean bbq like I've said the day before with carmel and xw. Located at Novena, Thomson rd. Super far from me and xw but since we have nothing better to do after finals so we decided to go over and try the food there after carmel tried with her friends and said it's nice. The place itself is better than 2D1N at Tanjung Pajar cause the smell of meat is not that strong and there's even cooked chicken wings and 茶叶蛋(?) served there (though I didn't even eat that). But the price is a bit higher than 2D1N, by $3 more? Anyway, we just eat chicken cause carmel and xw can't eat beef, their chicken are really good!! But too much of something good can be bad too. LOL

Anyway, spend the whole day today alone at home. Watched drama and play tetris. After this gonna go shower and visit the optician again, I guess my eye power increased again, can't see clearly with my left eye, gonna redo my specs again that I've just bought 1 month ago? Sigh. Lucky is the left eye and not the right vause my right is about 6.00 degree! Super high, while the left is 4.75 now? Can't really remember the left one but I know is slightly lesser than the right. Or is it I've been wearing cons too much nowadays and seldom let my eyes rest so my eyes got worst? but if there's the case then both of my eyes should have gotten worst and not just 1 right? AAHH, idk. *frustrated. Imagine looking at things with 1 eye blurry, felt so uncomfortable!! 

By the way, we're going to yiling 21st birthday party tomorrow, the we refer to me, xw and carmel. Whoa, so much happening this week, is like everything starts to crash down on me for neglecting my life for 3 months? Haven't even think of what to wear. Ggeerr, I need MORE CLOTHES! And oh, I still have tuition tomorrow morning. So I'm blogging now instead so that I can turn in earlier tonight. 

So here's the pics!

Noh, the only pic of the food.

carmel and me. 

Love this pic the most, our lens and the red color, PERFECT!

Hope my hair grow faster!

Opps xw looked fierce. HAHAHA.

Oh, my dad just called that he's reaching home in 15 minutes time, I need to prepare and leave house soon! So lucky I just finish blogging! bye!

PS: I think you're busy with your life to think of me so I'll just wait. 

C REAL - sorry but I.

Shopping day!

with xw yesterday. HAHA. Went to 313, H&M, Wisma, Mbs, Bugis. Met her at 11am and we shopped till 7pm? Don't really remember but I really don't remember when was the last time I shop till my legs felt sore. More than 4 months ago? Used to stand long hours working for artbox and I thought my legs got used to it but who's know my legs became weak now.LOL. Anyway didn't managed to buy anything except for a shades at h&m for $7.90, fucking cheap so it's a must grab item! Oh, we had Japanese buffet for lunch! Ate for 2 hours? Can't remember but super sinful to eat so much and tomorrow I'm going for korean bbq with xw and carmel again. HAHAHAHA. Poor tummy please don't get fat! To make myself feel better after all the good food, I'm going to jog early in the morning tomorrow with xw at Pioneer stadium near our area. Burn some fats before eating big feast later!

Ohya, went MBS to buy Harry Potter exhibition tickets on the 15th next month. After xw got back from her Bali trip. Super excited! If you know me, then you should know I'm a major hp's fan. HAHAHAHA. That's like my dream come true, I mean having to visit the exhibition! Might go twice to accompany my sis to go again. After buying the tickets, went to take a look at the casino, not really go in, she's a singaporean and I'm a PR, we need to pay $100 to enter so we just stood at the floor above the casino and look in from the side. Look exactly like those HongKong drama's casino. Dim lighting with red carpets all over. I got that 'WOW' feel when I start approaching the casino. I know I'm ulu. HAHAHA.

Should blog more about the details of our shopping day but my eyes are really getting tired. Dry and uncomfortable. Don't know why my eyes don't really feel good after wearing my cons back. Don't scares me please! I'm going to check them at the polyclinic like real soon. Maybe this weekend. Phew. Must be too tired because of revision and didn't get to rest them well. I'll blog again tomorrow if I reach home early. I hope I'll be.

Oh, I'm reading the Memory Keeper's daughter. Sounds like a really not bad novel, been wanting to buy since last year and am so lucky to found the book in xw's house that day I went there for my mani. Thanks her for lending it to me! So now I'm going back to my room and enjoy the book before heading to bed. I think my room now only serve 1 purpose, for sleeping. Spent the whole day facing computer today, no wonder my eyes felt tired. Okay, really had to go now. Night! :D

PS: I wish I'll be able to recognize you even after 30 years without meeting, just like in the drama 'love rain'. 

I'll update tomorrow,

Super tired today walking for the whole day. But I want to blog a bit so I'm here to talk.

I had a dream about you last night. I got a shock why I always dream of you nowadays. Even with finals pressure and I swear I'm not spending time thinking about you but you still appear. Why?

PS: I always like to talk to you, in the past, present and future. 

Past memories

I'll update a bit about my year 2 since I've never really blog about anything this year. For me the year will start when school starts and end at the last day of finals. So this year starts at Sept 22th, if I'm not mistaken and end at May 18th. Took principle of finance and banking, corporate finance, macroeconomics, auditing and assurance and retaking IBM. For finals, pbf is unexpectedly easy and the rest is just manageable. HOPE I'M GOING TO PASS ALL. I don't know why our papers have to be taken at expo, so gonna travel all the way there and back. Took 1 hour plus to go there by car and more than 1 hour plus back home. My first paper starts on 9th May, a Wednesday, pbf. Next paper cf, Thursday. Then macro on Friday. All in the morning 10am-1pm, seriously that week is really tiring for me. Felt so sleepy on the way back but have to revise for the next paper after reaching home. Didn't really get to rest and sleep well. After Macro the next paper is on 17th, Thursday and Friday, Auditing, 10am-1pm. I've never felt so stress before even though I said the papers was manageable. Every night before I sleep, I'll have to go through everything I've revise during the day and make sure I'm still able to memorize the main points. Stay up till 4am for few nights and wake up at 10am after sleeping for 6 hours. Spent like 6-12 hours studying each day. Last year at least I don't have to worry so much on my POA. But this year with all 4 new modules and IBM, is just too much for me to handle. Got nervous 6 days before finals thinking I might not be able to finish all my revision. Almost felt like crying cause I don't want to regret not working hard and putting in effort when I see my result 4 months later. So that few days I studied like crazy and tried to understand every little part of the notes so that even without memorizing I'll be able to recall something during finals. I paste a lot a lot of post it on my table so that it will helps me to remember all those little details on every modules I revise.

For the first paper, pbf, I finish the paper and left 20 minutes before the paper ends. I didn't know the latest we can leave is 10 minutes before the paper ends and not 20 minutes so I rush everything and leave thinking is the last minute for me to leave. I wanted to travel home earlier to revise for cf cause after the first hour of pbf I realised it's a easy paper, managed to finish everything and I'm satisfied with the answer I wrote. Cf is kinda hard this year but still managed to finish everything and leave 10 minutes earlier. I'll have to say the questions they ask is weird compared to cf tutorials. But I guess I didn't read on past year so I got a shock looking at some questions which carmel said she know that's normal cause she saw the past year papers. Anyway I've tried my best this time. Macro is a little harder than cf and I stayed all the way till the paper end. Paper suppose to end at 1pm but the collecting papers and counting process took like 30 minutes more so reached home 40 minutes later than I left early. Train was crowded and there's no seats when I'm really tired both mentally and psychically . :/ After cf when I reached home I really feel like crying. The pressure is really no joke. Phew, I'm so glad everything ended now and I finally get my life back. Didn't prepare anything for prelims and I failed all, but at least the result I got still shock me because that was above my expectation. Pure luck I guess. *smile.

After Macro I revised Auditing first since there's really not much for me to prepare. Common sense and some general knowledge that's all. But I'm not saying Audit is easy, is just I just can't find anything to revise. So read notes once over again and write down some important points then start revising IBM for 3 days. Memorized some models for major topics and read the mind map from the start till the end. Didn't know I can't drop IBM last year, if not I SWEAR I'M NOT GONNA GIVE UP! Seriously I really thought is okay to fail IBM that's why I only memorize 1 chapter out of the 10 and did 2 questions out of the 4 questions that is required. MAJOR FAIL. So this year I'm not gonna let history repeats itself and I wrote like crazy for all 4 questions. Didn't really write a lot but I guess I've pen down all the key points that I remembered. Stay throughout too and seriously I'm glad I tried my best. I'm gonna accept whatever result I'll get and be happy and satisfied with it. Auditing is a bit hard on the essay session so I choose 3 case studies and 1 theory question. Can't tell you the great feeling after the invigilator say it's time and stop writing. The feeling is like there's something happy rushing from the deep of me and I'm really glad everything ended well for me. Stay positive and everything will turn out fine.

Whoa, this is really a long post, took me some time to recall and type it out in words. Have to say my English really improved compared to last year. I always think my English not good, whether in writing or oral, but my results keep proving me wrong. Not that I score well but I always got results higher than I expected and deserved. Not complaining but just saying I really have luck during exams.

I'm really enjoying my life now, spending time watching drama and playing Tetris on facebook. It's super addictive for me! HAHAHAHA. Gonna go shopping with xianwen tomorrow for her Bali trip, accompanying her to shop while enjoying some time outside. Didn't manage to jog this morning due to the rain so we both slept back and meet at JP in the afternoon and she accompany me to get some shampoo for my freshly dyed red hair. LOL. After that went Esprit and ask if they have any vacancy, I'm lucky cause they need some part timer so I apply for it. Hope they'll call me soon, if not I'm going to apply for cotton on.

Okay, that's all for today.

PS: I hope you don't change. 

A late update tonight!

As in this is a midnight post, not a late post. HAHA. Dyed my hair with xw today (she dyed red too!) and my hair look red right? Seriously I really look emo when I don't smile, but that's because if I smile, I'll expose my chubby cheeks! Need braces soon to correct my teeth and perhaps I'll have a slimmer jawline or whatever you called it that give you a sharper face. Why my hair grow so slow when I want it to be longer, and fast when I want it to be shorter? Anyway I'm gonna go jog jog with xw tomorrow early in the morning so I'm suppose to head to bed early but I guess I'm kinda used to sleeping late. Don't even feel tired or fatigue. That's a different case when I'm still preparing for finals. Felt so tired and can't concentrate even when I took nap twice in the afternoon. I guess revision really stress the body out and result in worst body condition thus felt more tiring? Right? Ohya, after dyeing hair, went to xw house for my mani and this is how my nails look like. Cute right? Pastel colors with polka dots.

Done updating, night readers! 

PS: Doradora is so fucking addictive!

Today mark the first day of my 4 month plus holidays.

A detail post on my first day of hols!

Woke up early for tuition at 9am today. After that went JP to shop shop for awhile before my sis went out with her friend. Finally have the time to leisurely shop awhile w/o feeling guilty spending time on shopping and not on revision. I know it sounds a bit exaggerating but the pressure is really scary, I'll still look at the clock unconsciously and when I went out I will have the I-need-to-go-home-fast-and-sit-in-front-on-my-notes feeling. Is like there's this voice inside my brain that will keep chanting there's no time anymore, you have to revise now! O.o Anyway all this shit officially ends now and I can have my life back. HEH. Went to cotton on and bought a shorts at 2 at $30. Since the girl seem friendly when she's serving me so I asked her out of curiosity that how much is the part time hourly rates. She told me if I'm interested I'll have to apply online and is $7/h. LOL. Sounds tempting, at least its higher than the job I previously worked for. So I'll consider it. Or should I go for some office job? Hmm, with higher pay and a rather fixed working hours (excluding OT), but I'll have to buy some formal wear and perhaps some cosmetic? Which means before I receive my pay, I'll have to spend more money. :x So should I find another tutee? Hmmm. I just can't seem to make up my mind. Oh well, there's still 1 week plus till June. I'm just gonna chill and relax at home and start work at June.

Okay I'm gonna continue my Love Rain drama. HEH. Night readers!

AnnYeong!

Gonna dye my hair red tomorrow with xw! Excited much! Never had my hair red before except for highlights. After that gonna go xw's house for mani. Life's so much fun with friends. Laugh!

PS: I'm still waiting. 

U-KISS doradora!

Both Kevin and Kiseop fuckingg HOT!

Shout:

Hey, I'm back!

Finally ended the 3 months marathon of revising. Got my life back today. Heh!

Gonna blog more I swear! Postpone my plan to celebrate the finally freedom with xw and carmel due to the crazy menses cramps that kept attack me till I'm weak with no strength. Got no choice but to go home instead of having korean bbq at Novena. Sigh. But gonna go again on Thursday. :D

Can't get used to the sudden freedom now, there's just sooooooooooooooo much things I wanna do! Like blogging, watching drama, youtube, go shopping, learn Korean, maybe guitar?, and find a full time job!

I wanna go travel badly! Sigh, but my Redang trip got cancelled. :x I don't know if I'll go Penang or not, cause hmm due to some reasons. Oh well, I'll still stay positive and keep my fingers cross.

Didn't get to enjoy a good night sleep lately due to finals, I'm gonna turn in early tonight! Have to wake up early tomorrow for tuition. :/ Feels a bit lazy but INCOME motivates me! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay, gonna stop and watch a bit of youtube before going to bed and apply a mask! HEH!

PS: I LOVE MY LIFE!